Thursday, January 8, 2009

Pipe Down

Are we moving toward a yelling-based economy? I realize that my health, interests, and general crankiness qualify me as an honorary old coot, so I'm probably nobody's target demographic. But it seems like transacting commerce is requiring a lot more hollering than it used to. I stopped in at Jimmy Johns the other weekend, and the music was deafening. I had to yell my order two or three times to be heard. Same thing at Chipotle. And Starbucks does that thing where they want to "get something started" for the people in line, which means shouting "medium decaf latte" over the heads of strangers. I dislike it.

I know some restaurants actually pursue the noisiness with hard surfaces and open kitchens. The Rainforest Cafe had that whole damn fake jungle going on with the screeching monkeys and such. (My GOD was that annoying.) Apparently the hubbub acts on us like hallucinogen, making us think we're at the center of a "happening," when in fact we are just at Chili's happy hour, bitching about work. Do people enjoy this stuff, really, or is this just a phase we're all going through? Are they trying to make us anxious so we'll eat more? I think it's working.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Sis[mas]ter - I totally agree. This same realization occurred to me during the last few months when I found myself driving 1-2 hour stretches across Nebraska with the radio turned completely off. Somewhere between lunch at the I-can-talk-about-my-hemorrhoids-louder-than-you-Bistro and the 37th phonecall of the day, I subconsciously seek sensory deprivation. I'm thinking of opening a Martini bar called Shut-the-f@#k-up! An establishment completely soundproofed where the only accepted communication is cocktail napkins and crayons. If this caught on, we could declare a national Shut-the-f@#k-up! Day. All electronic media and telecommunication would be banned, and the employees of the restaurants you listed would attend mandatory picnics in the runway medians of the closest international airport...... whaddya think?


[over]loaded in Omaha

Anonymous said...

Brilliant! There is International Talk Like a Pirate Day (September 19th, I believe), so why not an International Shut-the-F@#k-Up Day? After all, it's not like you're starting from scratch:

http://www.therawfeed.com/2008/05/when-is-international-shut-up-day.html

Sassmaster said...

Omaha, you are a genius. Where do I sign up? I will bring the non-crunchy foods. (Banana pudding!) And speaking of hearing loss, I LOVE the Fargo Rock City. I'll be expressing it to you the minute I'm done reading. Thanks! (And Lucinda is awesome, as usual.)

Hammersox, you were pretty quick with that Talk Like a Pirate Day date. Avast!

Anonymous said...

cK and I have recently wondered if it's because we're getting older or if people really have become more annoying. It's not just the noise level - it's a lot of stuff! It brings me down when people are rude (and noisy). Am I less tolerant than I used to be? I think that the national Shut-the-F@#k-up!Day is a great idea! (it would be especially beneficial for, if not fully followed, in my old neighborhood in North Mpls)!

You're one cool chick, MC, and so is Omaha!

Erin