Wal-Mart Reads My Blog

I'm totally taking credit for this.

You may remember that I suggested that corporations and labor get together on the health care issue here. Apparently, Wal-Mart, Intel, and several other companies have joined labor union leaders to call for universal health care. Of course, Wal-Mart's been getting the government to pay for its health care for a while, by encouraging poorly paid employees to seek state aid. So, this is just the next logical step for them. But it's good!

I do love an unlikely alliance.

Don't Miss ...

... the adventures of Super Cat over at Drama Mater. Thank you cK for the kick-ass superhero!

Radio, Radio

Nothing makes me so ridiculously happy as happening upon "Ramblin' Man" by The Allman Brothers on the radio. I mean, I own the music, but cueing it up at home is nowhere near as cool as just being in the right place at the right time for it on the radio. Sometimes I don't even make it through the whole endless guitar solo at the end, but I always loudly sing, "I'm on my way to New Orleans this morning, leaving out of Nashville, Tennessee. They're always havin' a good time down on the bayou, Lord, and them Delta women think the world of me," like I believe every word is the truth.

I know I'm not the only one who gets all happy at random songs on the radio. Which one(s) make you go, "Sweet!" (or, if you're a Skynyrd fan, "Turn it up!")?

(Ooh! Speaking of Skynyrd, "I Know a Little" has the same effect.)

More Bingeing

Food Network's doing a marathon of Paula Deen shows today, and I know she may grate on some people, but I just think she's adorable (I've been using that word for everybody lately -- I must have some kind of infection). Her southern accent is so pronounced, and I love the way she says "oil" and "salad." She's all about sentiment and family and cute, and is always slipping her dogs little treats while she cooks. Her food looks tasty and familiar, though it's mostly stuff I wouldn't eat every day because she has a winking lack of restraint. I caught one of her shows this evening in which she told her audience that there were two things that really inspired her to cook: her deep fryer ("I love, love, love my deep fryer!") and butter. 'Nuff said.

But even when she's not cooking and they're just doing a show about her recent wedding, I'm totally invested.

I am not invested, however, in Semi-Homemade with Sandra Lee on Food Network. Oh, Sandra Lee. What are we going to do with you? (Maybe I am invested, but not in a good way.) This show's premise is food that's made with 70% ready-made ingredients mixed with 30% fresh foods. Which, I don't know, it's possible that some of this stuff is decent tasting. But at some point, isn't it just as easy to pick up some chili powder rather than using a paper packet of taco seasoning? She does stuff like that a lot. On one show, she scooped the filling out of a couple of store-bought pumpkin pies to use in a dessert. I'm sorry, that's just weird. Also, rather than throwing out the pie crust, she suggested we use them as a topping for ice cream or something...

There's just an air of desperation about her show. Every episode features "cocktail time" with a recipe for a mixed drink. She has 101 uses for vanilla vodka. And it doesn't matter what kind of meal/event/holiday she's planning -- Halloween, brunch, kid's birthday -- she has invited adults, and they must have alcohol, apparently. And absolutely everything has a theme. She's like a Vegas hotel that way. Everything must address the theme in a clear and color-coordinated way. I don't know what happens without the theme -- extra drinking I guess.

The theme leads inexorably to the last segment of the show -- the "tablescape." Before we go, Sandra must show us what her fevered imagination has done to the dining table. It is always crowded with centerpieces, elaborate place settings, fanciful napkins, many layered tablecloths, party favors, and other geegaws, all generally created especially for this occasion (from the craft store!) and all looking like they could never serve another purpose, unless she chose to throw the exact same party again some time. Girlfriend loves her some fabric and a glue gun.

If you don't believe me, ask these people.

One Food Network show I feel I should like better is Everyday Italian. It's hosted by Giada De Laurentiis who seems pleasant enough, but I'm distracted by her giant teeth. It isn't so much that they are excessively large, but that she speaks and smiles in such a way as to be emphasizing them all the time. Or maybe her whole head is out of proportion? Plus, of course, she's always putting something in her mouth. Teeth again! Can't handle it. Her food seems like it would be quite good; I really should try one of her recipes sometime.

Birthday Brother

It's Matty's birthday today. Happy Birthday! To celebrate, I'm posting his adorable but potentially embarrassing 2nd grade photo. Anyone who's been to my house has seen it already--I can't resist pointing it out. There's the classic scab on the forehead, undoubtedly from some farming-related activity. But I love the obsequious half smile honed from years as his oldest brother's right-hand man. For a long time, I believe Beau never held a tool that was not fetched for him by Matt.


The more recent photo was taken at my birthday party a couple years ago. He drove all the way up to St. Paul to celebrate with his sister. Awww.

These days, he's got the cutest kid ever, and he's about to get married to Catherine, who's the greatest. Very exciting stuff. You deserve it honey! Hope you have an awesome birthday.

Binge Watchin'

I've become an avid watcher of cooking programs. The Food Network, the PBS shows, Anthony Bourdain, and even the random cooking segments on the weekend "news" programs, if I'm clicking through on my way someplace else--I'm an equal opportunity watcher. My viewing has become a bit more tentative since I began my current reducing plan--I can only handle so much delicious food photography these days before I have to run away and eat a Rykrisp. And foodies and chefs are notoriously averse to, say, removing the butter simply to make a dish healthier. Taste is their master, and the rest of us just have to control ourselves.

Indeed, most of the these shows are really focused on special-occasion food, even though the most talked about show currently is probably Rachel Ray's 30-Minute Meals. (And her magazine, Every Day with Rachel Ray.) In general, these people are making entrees that helpfully include most, if not all, your daily calories. You know, so you save the trouble of eating more than once a day.

The weird necessity of narrating something as mundane as cooking makes many a show tedious, but I love tracking the stuff that comes up over and over. Like, every time someone busts out a shallot, you hear some version of, "Shallots have a mild onion-y flavor that won't overwhelm the [main ingredient]." Every. Single. Time. And lord, the chicken. Everyone MUST treat it as a biohazard. Alton Brown's instructions for breading chicken that's about to be fried is like something the CDC would come up with. Wash your hands or the terrorists win!

But I'm spending a lot of time on the food shows. And I'm not the only one.

One of my favorites is America's Test Kitchen on PBS on Saturday mornings. It appeals to my irrational belief that there is in fact a best way to do everything. That's the whole premise of the test kitchen and the magazine it supports, Cooks Illustrated. They'll take a common dish (today it was Chicken Kiev) and create what they can call a definitive recipe. (In case you were wondering, no definitive recipes are ever low-fat or low-calorie.) Perhaps I'm also drawn in by the fact that the magazine's editor is the show's host, even though he's kind of a smarty-pants know-it-all. But, in my experience, most magazine editors are smarty-pants know-it-alls, so I guess I shouldn't hold it against him.

Everyday Food appears periodically on the Saturday morning PBS lineup--it's on at 10:30 a.m. these days. It's a typical offering from Martha Stewart Omnimedia. The kitchens look art directed. The hosts, ingredients, scripts, tone are flawless, which can be a little off-putting. (Omni is such a good prefix for Martha. Everything about her is so damn ... consistent.) But this show led me to the magazine of the same name that I've been evangelizing about for a while. I love its design, the choice of recipes and how each has a limited number of ingredients, the way they feature specific ingredients (Have you tried dried figs?), the index, and the fact that every recipe is provided with accompanying nutritional information. Say what you want about Martha, but she puts out excellent magazines.

Rachel Ray's 30 Minute Meals on the Food Network is mostly unwatchable, I think. Her voice is like a perky foghorn. I can actually feel my hair blow back when her show comes on and she starts in with the yelling. I haven't tried any of her recipes, so I don't know if her cooking stands up. I can't get past the voice and over-enthusiastic manner. I could pick up her magazine, I guess, but she's photographed to be a faithful print version of her television persona: waxy, airbrushed, and aggressively cheerful. I do appreciate that unlike most people on TV, she has a normal woman's body and doesn't seem to feel the need to turn herself into a stick. That crap is especially disingenuous in cooking-show hosts.

Ina Garten's Barefoot Contessa on the Food Network is enjoyable, though she's definitely true to the whole "special-occasion food" thing. Everything she makes seems to have a million calories, though, to be fair, her show is really about entertaining. Also, I wish I knew how she got her hair so shiny.

I kind of like the idea of Rick Bayless's Mexico, One Plate at a Time on PBS. He travels around Mexico talking about food in the different regions, and he's obviously passionate about the cuisine. But he gets too close to the camera and talks in this weird affected way. You just know that in person he's a close-talker who totally corners people at parties and discusses random topics too earnestly while stroking their arm in a way that makes them uncomfortable.

The food show that I loved more than all of these was Cucina Toscana. Two guys, Damian and his nephew Johnny, who are equal parts Italian-American and Texan. It was this mishmash of barbeque and Tuscan cuisine, with "y'all" and "ciao bella!" bandied about in the same breath. They talked a lot about their extended family. They always had music playing, and Damian was always randomly bursting into song--usually some old country tune. Why oh why won't PBS bring this one back? Oh, I have the biggest crush on Damian.

Tomorrow: Giant teeth and the horror of "tablescapes."

Adorable II

Because it's production week at work and it's ridiculously cold outside, my brain power is all used up with avoiding frostbite and fine-tuning articles on corporate event marketing. I couldn't think of anything to post, so I'm imitating the cK again and putting up adorable pictures of my mom when she was a kid. (cK, why couldn't I link to that post in your archive?) She's on the right with siblings Joe and Rosemary. It looks like those bows might eat their heads! Also, notice there seemed to be a standard template used for cutting bangs.